And so we begin the part of the Bible that, I believe, proves that God didn't design intimacy between a husband and wife just for procreation. He also designed it for recreation. There, I said it. Sex, in it's initial design, was meant for procreation, yes, but also for the mutual enjoyment of both the husband and the wife. There is so very little discussed about sex in the church. Our young people are hungry for information in this area and since the church provides very little answers, they go elsewhere and get misinformation. When I read the Songs I see that God says "Yes! Have sex! Yes, enjoy sex! Yes! Want sex! However, my dear children, enjoy it in marriage, with your spouse, edifying and lifting the other person up." It is my desire to communicate that to the youth in our church. I want them to hear how sex was designed by God to be, not only outside of marriage, but also inside of marriage. I got the feeling, before I was married, that I was not supposed to enjoy it. It was supposed to be a 'duty' that I had to do. Something I maybe allowed my husband to do to me every once in a while when he had begged me enough. I don't see that at all with this woman.
2 Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth—
for your love is more delightful than wine. 3 Pleasing is the fragrance of your perfumes; your name is like perfume poured out. No wonder the maidens love you! 4 Take me away with you—let us hurry!
Let the king bring me into his chambers.This woman has a sense of urgency. She can't wait to get alone with this man! Granted, some would say this is honeymoon love and yes, there is an urgency and a frequency that is often not like any other time in marriage. Circumstances, children, exhaustion can all take time away from this very good marriage builder.
But I want to encourage you with something I have found in my own marriage that shores up where we cannot. And that is prayer. Some may think it silly and I felt a bit ridiculous when I prayed for God to bless my husband and I in this area. But you know what? The Lord did. I encourage you too, if you are married, to pray for the Lord's blessing in this area. Marriage is such a good teacher for our relationship with Christ, He wants all areas of our marriage to be blessed.
I know some older commentators like to say that the Songs is only about the relationship between Christ and the church and while I would agree that there are some strong analogies that we can draw from that, I really do believe it is the true love story between a man and a woman. I love that the bible touches all areas of life, from the most appalling to the very appealing, God has something to say about everything. It tells me that He cares for all aspects of our lives. Thank you Father God!
Tomorrow's passage: Song of Solomon 4-5, Acts 7:1-21
3 comments:
Great post, Kathryn! I agree that the church has had too little to say about the beauty of sex in marriage over the centuries.
Mary Kassian has been a guest on Revive Our Hearts a few times and she's got some really good insights about the importance of seeing sex how it was intended. This broadcast, in particular, is a really good one.
Thank you, Kathryn! Sex is not THE most important ingredient in a marriage, but it's definitely high up on the list. In spite of all the other things in our lives that keep us from it at times, I still believe it is important to MAKE time for it (even if you have to schedule it) because that intimacy with your spouse does carry benefits into the other aspects of your marriage and family life. Thanks for your thoughts.
Great thoughts here Kathryn. I think the church spends time talking about what sex is not, but not much about what sex is. That was a great broadcast Tammi - with a ton of info on what God intended sex to be.
We need to be transparent with our kids about this. We can't just say "don't have sex before marriage cause I said so". They need to know what a precious gift marital sex is, and the dangers of extra-marital sex. And if you didn't wait, it is not hypocritical of you to instruct your kids in this. In fact, you can use your own negative experience to show them why you don't want them to go through the same thing.
Talk and talk some more!
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